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Life is full of things to share. My attempt at sharing my little piece of life.

Saturday, January 31, 2015

Keep on starting again.

In my mind, a week off = STARTING ALL OVER!

I've been running (consistently) for about 15 years and I still act like a beginner sometimes.

There are times when running is hard, getting out the door is hard, life is hard.  So you I miss a few days, or you I take some time off and (if you are anything like me), immediately think.

I jumped on the trails on Monday this week and my first thoughts were.

Back at it again.
I'm out of shape.
This time I'll keep it up.
Need to register for a race so I stay fit.

As I clicked into mile three, I realized...
You've been running 3 days a week consistently and calling that "not running", "off my fitness plan", "not in shape" etc.

At the end of the run I took stock and realized I haven't ever truly been starting over. I'm just starting up again and thats OK.

I ran with a great group of ladies this morning. They work, they're moms, they run, weight train, stay active, they are fit. Someone said: "I haven't run since last weekend" and she was asked "busy at work?"
Her response-"no, just that kind of week, didn't feel like it".

Learning to give myself permission to be OK with having a 'week like that' has actually helped me to continue to run and enjoy my running.

After injury early last year, I took a break from distance running. Ran 5ks, 8ks and no more, and I'm OK with that.

My hope is to run another marathon this year in honor of my sister and her struggles in life and anyone who struggles in life. Running for me has always been a way to heal, a way to reach out to others, a way to connect.

Let's run some miles together!

Wednesday, January 21, 2015


I lost my sister 3 weeks ago. My sister was an addict.

Those are very painful things for me to say. 

Today I ran to clear my head, work toward healing, get frustrations out...etc.

I wasn't looking for answers, there aren't any really. I wasn't looking for peace or clarity or any other healing type moment.

Passing under a bridge on a familiar greenway path, I stopped to look at the water. When I turned to get back on the path this is what I saw.

One word.
It stung.
I do not feel hopeless, but in that moment I felt my sisters pain and the pain of so many around us. 
One word. 

When I run I choose routes based on my needs, desire, strength, determination for that day. Today I purposely chose a route with a strong downhill mile 1, completely flat mile 2 and uphill mile 3.
I wanted the challenge at the end.
I wanted to feel free, easy and accomplished at the start and struggling and working hard at the end. I didn't want it to be easy to finish-I wanted needed to see if I had what it took to finish strong.  

The run was good. I accomplished what I set out to. No great healing, no great revelations. But hopeless kept ringing in my head all day.

I don't think I will ever do anything grand to help anyone who struggles with feelings of hopelessness or despair, but as I ran further away from the word hopeless, I realized something. I realized that I will continue to run and in running I hope to encourage anyone around me who will listen to get outside, to move, to experience, to love, to be, to enjoy, to hope. One by one maybe I can help change that one word to hope.